Curling Foothairs the Hard Way

While braiding our feethairs the other night, Kae and I put pink polish on her toenails to complement the pink ribbons I had braided into her toe ringlets. As we put finishing touches on Kae’s curl, she asked me why I don’t use rollers (like she does.)I told her of my expedition. It was not my first choice in grooming salons… a cave. It was dark and desperate getting out, and I bumped my head a few times. I rubbed my head and my hand hit the wall. I felt a sliver go in. I plunked down on the floor and stubbed my toe getting there. An old ranger taught me a trick a long time ago to thank me for giving his sword back. I remembered it just in time although my eyes were sore for a good four weeks after that and I dreamt every night of eagles. I did get out though.

As I sat weeping over my situation, my da’s voice rang in my head ”Always carry a bit of rope girl.” But I had no rope. This led to my thinking about another thief. I don’t make keys but I make sure I have some. Keys are a good idea. If you have a key you don’t need a pick. Never underestimate the power of keys. If the door you are opening should happen to have a spell on it well, let’s just say I knew a thief once that thought they would be all smart and pick themselves into the home of a wizard. This thief totally missed the fact that the wizard had left a key on the coffee table and kept running around the house making spell traps go off. The thief even managed to unleash the wizard’s pet baby dragon. (said be spawn of Smaug *THE* Smaug, that our very own Master of Bag–End, Bilbo Baggins tricked so long ago. The thief in my tale, however, did NOT get the key.

The thief finally found the door out, (it was locked), tried picking it, (going through a whole pocket of lock picks), muttered a bit & slumped by the door thinking. Big thinks like this involve hitting the door a few times with your head, thus setting off a spell.

The spell made him glow a particular shade of orange for at least a year! His thieving career was over. So you see my dear hobbits, you should always grab any key you see. The thief still tried getting into houses and did not understand his lack of success, all the while glowing. He must have drank something in that wizard’s house.

Kae asked me: ”Where does the foothair curl come in? And how did you get out of the cave?”

“I made that thief a bet, a very good clever bet.”

”I bet it was,” Kae said smartypantsishly.

”So clever Kae, that I cannot tell you about it, or the dragon would have to kill you.”

Kae shivered. ”Dragon?” she whimpered.

”The baby’s mommy.Yes well I made this bet. And the dragon didn’t fit in the bag. So he kind of ate the other thief. And I got the bag!”

For some hobbits, singed foothair NEVER grows back, and for others it can come in very curly. So there you go! Curling foothair, the hard way!

–––Meril S.f.

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